I’ve called it a sacred space; I’ve heard it referred to as a womb-room. It’s the space we created in our bedroom after our children were born. It was quiet or quietly interactive, at times light and sometimes dark, filled with love and laughter, wonder and joy. Here, we ate, slept, changed diapers, snuggled, sniffed, caresses, bathed, listened with ears and hearts, watched and wept. (more…)
Speaking to a group of Doulas in the DoulaCARE network on Sunday, I got an interesting peak into the concerns some women have about lying-in. I’ve written before that I hear from women who think that it sounds terrific, but are certain that they could never do it. They cite family expectations, an active lifestyle or an un-evolved partner who could not attend to the household as I was fortunate to have done. (more…)
Perhaps I got it from my mother’s rigorous schedule for us kids, but I knew early on that my kids would be the early-to-bed, early-to-rise type. For me, the reasons lie in nature — both the human type and the environmental type. I wake up around the same time every day and want most to be in bed by 10:00 p.m. — sometimes earlier! But happily, the sun follows me, or I it, so aside from being different from the truly social-set, I never feel odd. Perhaps I’m not the best late-dinner party guest, but I’m ok with that. I shine brightest in the daylight! (more…)
Fifteen days of blissful gazing into the eyes of your newborn, resting, nursing and finding that Zen Momma place reads like an idyllic start to a new life together. But who can actually stay in bed for 15 days?? You’ve got new grandparents clamouring at the door, a bundle of joy to show off and your brain is accustomed to multi-tasking 16 things. Lying-in is not for you, right? Don’t write it off so quickly. (more…)
I’ve got the kind of focus you want in an emergency: clear thought, process orientation and endurance. Those skills and that laser sharp focus come into play when I’m called upon to deal with a sick child or wedge a car out of a scrape (both of which I had to do last week). But that kind of thinking also comes to mind for me when I recall the first weeks with my babes. (more…)
I’ve had a number of people e-mail me requesting the prescription for lying-in which I talk about in the September-October 2006 issue of Mothering. The “prescription” comes out of Bridget Lynch’s many years of clinical work, research and post-doctoral writing and I was blessed to have received the lessons as part of my experience. I look forward to one day reading about the history and clinical results she observed, and if and when that time comes, I will write here about where to find it.