Speaking to a group of Doulas in the DoulaCARE network on Sunday, I got an interesting peak into the concerns some women have about lying-in. I’ve written before that I hear from women who think that it sounds terrific, but are certain that they could never do it. They cite family expectations, an active lifestyle or an un-evolved partner who could not attend to the household as I was fortunate to have done. (more…)
I dig in my heels and entrench my position further — and its not the kind of well reasoned, deeply felt through position one entrenches for. The voice of reason is cat calling to me, don’t say anything else. This tact isn’t working, shift course now or shut up. But the voice that has the floor is unyielding, stubborn in her intractability and escalating the discussion. She may even be showing distain for her adversary: an independent four and a half year old. I am not proud of myself, but at the same time I can’t seem to help it. (more…)
As he bounces up and down on the trampoline, I can see he’s thinking about all the instructions he’s received over time. Tuck jump, star jump, and seat drop with hands beside your bum. He bounces off the 10 tuck jumps requested by his gymnastics “coach” without out a thought. When she asks him to drop to his seat then bounce back up to his feet, he performs the move flawlessly. When she advances the move to include seat to knees and hands, instead of feet, he tries twice before getting the rhythm. When he looks up at me his faces shines with pride and I can feel him soaking up my verbal encouragement and my clapping. (more…)
You can see it in their eyes, the kids who have a sense of self and a sense of purpose. They are the ones who never fall between the cracks, they fit in where they shine and enjoy a comfortable social life. How do they get that way? (more…)
There are some decisions with which I will just never be comfortable. I don’t shy away from making choices generally, but there are some that just don’t seem to have an option that I can feel certain about. (more…)
“Unreachable” in the sense of being non-responsive, is not a quality in which I take pride. But it is a hard fact of my personality. Moving through the motions of organizing breakfast or working through a problem up-loading music, I know I can be unavailable to my family. I hear their requests for milk or queries about dinner plans but I am unable to break myself away from my focus to respond. It’s an ugly quality, but a classic one for an introvert. I want to be different. (more…)